Valentine’s Day is a time many of us evaluate, or re-evaluate, our romantic relationships. Are we still in love? Are we happy? Is this partnership an actual partnership and is it working?
What makes relationships last?
Many people turn to couples or relationship therapy to answer these questions. At RIVIA, one of the couples-based therapies we use to improve communication is the Gottman Method for Healthy Relationships. This method is based on nearly 40 years of the study and research of relationships by psychologist John M. Gottman and his wife, psychologist Julie Gottman. The Gottman method can be used both to educate newly committed partners and to help long-time couples that are experiencing upheaval.
Couples Therapy Using The Gottman Method
What is the Gottman method? Gottman therapy focuses on not only providing skills for managing relationships, but uses the couple’s patterns of interaction to teach them to implement relationship-building and problem-solving skills together.
The essential building blocks of a successful partnership.
According to the Gottmans, good relationships are based on nine essential elements. You can think of these principles as the building blocks for a sound and healthy relationship house.
- Trust
- Commitment
- Build love maps (become intimately familiar with each other’s world)
- Share fondness and admiration
- Turn toward one another
- Positive perspective
- Manage conflict
- Make life dreams come true
- Create shared meaning
What to expect in a Gottman therapy session?
By sharing individual histories, relationship philosophies and goals, each partner will establish a connection with the therapist. The couple will undergo a thorough assessment of the marriage, or relationship, including engaging in discussion of topics on which partners disagree. In addition, the partners will learn the components needed for a good relationship and rediscover the fondness and respect that first brought them together. The therapist will coach them in using and practicing these new skills resulting in a deeper level of trust and a path to help mend past disputes.
Finally, the pair will acquire the tools necessary for checking and maintaining a healthy relationship post therapy. If you and a loved one are looking to repair or improve an existing relationship, or interested in premarital counseling, book an appointment with us today and let us help reignite that spark!